With only one more month to go in my Booking It Through History: First Ladies project, I was a bit sad to research Nancy Reagan this month. However, I was quickly heartened by her strength and tenacity. Wife to one of my favorite presidents, Nancy was one tough lady with a heart of gold and a spine of steel.
Each month, I’ll detail the life of the first lady and their legacy. Then I’ll share what I learned while studying them, along with ways you can travel in their footsteps through historical sites and museums. I’ll also share books, podcasts, TV shows, and websites where you can learn even more about that first lady. Read all of the way through the blog post or click on the links below to go straight to those sections.
Life
All photos courtesy of Ronald Reagan Library unless indicated
Childhood
Born on July 6, 1921 in New York City, Anne Frances Robbins was the only child of Edith and Kenneth Robbins. Nancy was a nickname given to her at birth that stuck with no idea of its origin. Her parents were already estranged with her actress mother toting little Nancy around to parties and the backstage of Broadway shows. Her father was a failing car salesman who would not have any impact on Nancy’s life.
“Since Kenneth Robbins was such a small part of my life, it is impossible for me to think of him as my father.” Nancy Reagan
When Nancy was two, she was sent to live with Edith’s sister, Virginia, in Bethesda, Maryland. She had a charmed upbringing there with her aunt, uncle, and cousin Charlotte who was just three years older than Nancy. She attended the prestigious Sidwell Friends School where she quickly rose to the top.
“A very bright child, very popular with the children, and a blessing to the teacher. Nancy does everything well.” Nancy’s teacher in 1927
Her aunt even took her to the White House Easter Egg roll when Calvin Coolidge was president. Little Nancy loved it when her mother came for her infrequent visits and was enthralled watching her mother perform on the stage.
Her life changed when she was eight as her mother remarried and moved them to Chicago. Nancy now had a doting stepfather, Dr. Loyal Davis, who was a renowned neurosurgeon, and a stepbrother, Richard.
Leaving her stage life behind, her mother propelled the family into Chicago society. Even during the lean years of the Great Depression, Nancy was insulated from the hardships in her apartments on Lake Shore Drive. She attended a prestigious high school and spent the summers at a camp on Lake Michigan. She wasn’t the best student but was very popular.
“Nancy’s social perfection is a constant source of amazement.” 1939 yearbook
She loved participating in school plays, including one aptly named “First Lady.” Her mother’s Hollywood friends would often visit, especially stars like Spencer Tracy.
She engineered her own adoption by her stepfather at age fourteen, traveling to New York City to get the signature from her biological father. When he reluctantly gave it, she sent a wire to Chicago that read, “Hi Dad.” She soon changed her name to Nancy Davis.
After high school, she attended Smith College where she liked to joke that she majored in English, theater, and boys. She was one of three theater majors, and as WWII raged in Europe, she participated in Factory Follies, a morale-boosting musical troupe that entertained at dozens of war plants. She spent her summers doing summer stock in New England and Wisconsin.
Nancy was very popular with young men and always had plenty of dates. She soon became engaged, but she abruptly canceled it soon after it was announced. She wasn’t ready to be tied down.
After graduation, she moved back to Chicago and joined the Junior League. She worked as a salesgirl at Marshall Field’s and trained as a nurse’s aid, but she was restless and bored. Her mother put in a good word for her with a friend, and soon Nancy was traveling all over the country in a play. She eventually made it to Broadway where she hobnobbed with friends like Katherine Hepburn and Clark Gable.
She began working in television and movies and moved to Hollywood, signing a long-term contract with MGM in 1949 thanks to family friend Spencer Tracy. The studio shaved two years off her age, and while she didn’t become a star, she had steady work.
Courtship and Marriage
“I’ve always wanted to belong to somebody and to love someone who belonged to me. I always wanted someone to take care of me, someone I could take care of.” Nancy Reagan
After signing her contract in 1949, Nancy became alarmed when her name was mentioned in a list of Communist sympathizers. It turned out to be another actress named Nancy Davis, but she was still worried it would affect her contract, so she had a friend reach out to Ronald Reagan, the president of the Screen Actors Guild, for support. He asked Ronnie to meet with her and that’s how they had their first date. They started at a restaurant and continued to Hollywood clubs until 3:30 am.
Ronnie was newly divorced from his ex-wife, Jane Wyman, and he wasn’t ready to settle back down so their relationship was off/on for the next couple years. In 1951, they started getting more serious as he invited her to his ranch and introduced her to his two children. In early 1952, he asked Nancy to marry him at usual booth at Chasen’s.
“Nancy moved into my heart and replaced an emptiness I had been trying to ignore for a long time.” Ronald Reagan
Nancy’s pregnancy hastened the wedding plans, ensuring a short engagement. They married on March 4, 1952 at the Little Brown Church in the San Fernando Valley. She wore a gray wool suit with a white collar, and they spent their wedding night at Mission Inn in Riverside (where the Nixons married) and honeymooned in Phoenix’s Biltmore hotel with her parents who loved Ronnie.
“My life really began when I married my husband.” Nancy Reagan
The newlyweds moved into a small house in Pacific Palisades and daughter Patricia was born on October 22, 1952. Their acting careers were both faltering, so he took a gig in Las Vegas as a host. Nancy went with him, leaving 3-month-old Patti with the housekeeper in Los Angeles. She also took another acting role to make money for the family.
Ronnie continued a hosting career through GE Theater on television, making him a bigger star than any movie could have done. Not only was he on a weekly show viewed by millions, GE sent him to factories all around the country where he got to know the workers and hear their concerns. Nancy didn’t like his long absences and was full of anxiety, especially when they had a second child, Ron, on May 20, 1958. Her life was full of car pools and kids activities while he was traveling all over the country. However, he would always write to her from his stops, his love evident in his playful words.
As Ronnie became interested in politics, the family was picture-perfect on the outside but filled with strife at home. Ronnie’s two children with his first wife did not always feel welcome, and Nancy’s relationship with Ronnie’s eldest son, Michael, was especially fraught.
Political Wife
Ronnie gave a speech in support of the Republican presidential candidate Barry Goldwater in 1964 and was asked to run for California governor in 1966. Nancy was an integral part of outreach and gave him the political support and advice he needed. She also got them in social circles much like her own mother had done when she remarried and moved to Chicago. Nancy did charity work like clothing drives and became good friends with Betsy Bloomingdale. Ronnie relied on her vivacious personality as he had a harder time with social climbing.
Ronnie also hated conflict so Nancy was his enforcer, particularly as the campaign heated up. She called the campaign workers all the time with advice and questions and knew when Ronnie needed rest.
The problems with their children didn’t make things easy. Even with all of the personal drama, Ronald Reagan won the election in a landslide.
“I had always thought you waited up all night listening to the returns, and although this may sound silly, I felt let down. After so much hard work, Ronnie’s early and overwhelming victory seemed almost an anticlimax.” Nancy Reagan
Governor’s Wife
Ronnie was sworn in as California’s governor on January 2, 1967 with the inaugural celebration held three days later. Nancy wore an elegant one-shouldered white gown studded with sparkling daisies.
“The eyes of the fashion world, long focused on Jackie Kennedy as a pacesetter, are already finding pleasure in watching Mrs. Reagan.” Oakland Tribune
Nancy quickly found out that she didn’t like Sacramento, especially the dilapidated governor’s mansion. She moved the family into another house and solicited donations to build a new mansion, which didn’t sit well with the public. She also didn’t participate in the capital social scene, electing to spend every weekend back home in Los Angeles.
She engendered some ill will, especially with the burgeoning feminist movement who thought she was too focused on Ronnie. Famous writer Joan Didion wrote a nasty hit piece on her. Ronnie’s staff also didn’t like dealing with her as she called incessantly with ideas and to check on Ronnie. The office got a “handler” to deal with her named Michael Deaver. They became close and she trusted him.
Ronnie was re-elected in 1970, and the inauguration celebration was full of Hollywood stars. Frank Sinatra dedicated his song, Nancy (with the laughing face), to Nancy at the ball.
Nancy took her role as First Lady of California seriously and enjoyed hearing from everyday Californians. She visited hospitals and helped Vietnam veteran families and POW wives, organizing dinners when they came home in 1973. She became close to one POW, John McCain, and his wife, Carol.
“If I don’t have a chance to put my arms around them, I’m going to pop.” Nancy Reagan on the Vietnam POWs coming home
The Reagans left the governor’s mansion in 1974 and had no idea what was next.
Run for the White House
Ronnie had an ill-fated run for the White House in 1968 that was costly for his reputation. Nancy didn’t like how it affected his political outlook and was determined to never hold back her opinion again on political matters.
The kids (now young adults) were still rebelling against their parents and their political values. The Reagans weren’t especially close parents either, choosing to attend Tricia Nixon’s wedding in Washington instead of Michael’s wedding.
The family had to have a meeting to discuss Ronnie’s run for the presidency in 1975 which would mean taking on the sitting president Gerald Ford. Nancy was involved in most campaign decisions, and when it looked hopeless, she wanted him to quit but he refused. Miraculously, Ronnie started winning primaries, and it came down to the Republican convention. Nancy and Betty Ford were locked in an applause feud as they took their seats with Betty winning. Ronnie and Nancy were devastated when he lost the nomination.
They returned to California defeated and bitter. Their 18-year-old son, Ron, upset them even more by dropping out of Yale to pursue ballet. Nancy was convinced Ronnie would run again in 1980, and she talked with advisors daily to keep up. As the political machine took off, she was front and center in all decisions although she was not happy when Ronnie chose George H.W. Bush as his vice presidential candidate.
The Reagans moved to the Washington area for the campaign season, living at Wexford which had been built by John and Jackie Kennedy. The press portrayed her as snobby and manipulating, especially when she told him what to say at some press conferences. She tried to combat it by having a favorable biography written about her.
It didn’t matter how the country felt about Nancy. They loved Ronnie, and he won in a landslide.
First Lady
Nancy knew she had to court Washington society. She hosted parties for friends and foes alike before the inauguration and had other Washington social doyennes like Katherine Graham host events as well. She still couldn’t prevent the bad press as she gave a disastrous interview to Helen Thomas of UPI and word leaked that she had been rude to Rosalynn Carter on her White House tour (which Nancy denied). It was true, however, that Nancy wasn’t impressed with the White House and set to make renovating and restoring it her top priority upon moving in.
The inauguration was a huge, four-day extravaganza. Nancy dazzled in her designer dress and jewels at ten inaugural balls, and Ronnie set a new precedent by taking the oath on the west side of the Capitol for the first time, allowing more Americans to see.
Just a few weeks into the White House, Nancy threw Ronnie an extravagant 70th birthday party and the staff worried the press would turn on her for her lavish ways and Hollywood friends. They were right. She received more vitriol for renovating the White House and buying new china even though both projects were sorely needed.
The press gave her awful nicknames like “Queen Nancy” “Iron Butterfly,” helping burnish her image as the most unpopular first lady in modern history. Feminists also raged against her as being too “adoring” of Ronnie.
“You know, some days, I feel like if it rains, it must be my fault.” Nancy Reagan
One event would change Nancy’s focus and embolden her to not care what the press or public said. On March 30, 1981, Ronnie was shot as he left the Washington Hilton. While Nancy was told immediately that he wasn’t hit, she insisted on leaving the White House for the hospital where they were taking him as a precaution.
“If you don’t get me a car, I’m going to walk.” Nancy Reagan to Secret Service
Thank goodness she went to the hospital as it was discovered that not only had the president been shot, it was serious. She consoled an ashen Ronnie who had lost almost half of the blood in his body, concealing her horror at his appearance. Even in this state, he joked with her. “Honey, I forgot to duck.”
She argued with the White House physician about his care and resisted all advice even from her children. Her sole focus was on Ronnie’s health.
“Ronald and Nancy Reagan are two halves of a circle; together, they are complete, and their children float outside.” Patti (Reagan) Davis
Ronnie stayed in the hospital for twelve days and returned to the White House with Nancy acting as his protector. She set up a gym so he could improve his lung capacity after its partial removal and finished renovations on the solarium. He got better but she was wracked by tension and anxiety, losing weight and looking gaunt.
This is when she began turning to astrology. Nancy consulted with a California woman claiming to be an astrologer a couple times a week to help plan the presidential calendar. It helped her cope with her fear about a supposed curse of being elected in a year ending in 00 (Presidents Harrison, Lincoln, Garfield, McKinley, Harding, FDR, and JFK had all died in office). Ronnie had no idea she was doing this, so when it came out in a tell-all book years later, it was embarrassing.
Nancy found a cause to take up some of her anxious energy. The “Just Say No” campaign was one of the most successful and well-known campaigns by a first lady in history with almost 14,000 chapters of drug abuse prevention clubs in existence during the 1980s. Named after her response to a little girl’s question of what to say to those pushing drugs, Nancy made it a top priority, raising funds for treatment and prevention while appearing on televisions shows like “Diff’rent Strokes” to promote it.
“If we don’t do something, it seems to me we’re just going to lose a whole generation. Their brains are going to be mush. It’s the future of our country. I think it’s the most serious problem.” Nancy Reagan
In 1985, she hosted drug abuse summits at the White House and at the United Nations for wives of world leaders. And in 1988, she was the first First Lady to address the United National General Assembly as the leader of the US delegation at a session on youth, families, and crime prevention. When she attended the wedding of Prince Charles and Lady Diana, she also took time to visit drug clinics in England, and she also made a point to visit those in Rome and Germany during a European tour. She also encouraged a tough new anti-narcotic bill which Ronnie signed into law in 1986.
“My work against drugs has provided me with the most fulfilling years of my life.” Nancy Reagan
Nancy considered her top duty, though, to be taking care of Ronnie’s physical well-being followed by keeping an eye on those around him. She was worried that people were taking advantage of him and headed off problems before he was aware. She didn’t shy away from bad news like he did and knew how to approach him with information. If she didn’t like a staffer, it usually spelled doom for them, and she was the unseen hand behind many departures.
She didn’t like the Bushes and had a long-standing feud with Barbara Bush (although Ronnie and George got along). She wouldn’t include them on guest lists for White House events even though they were the vice presidential couple.
She almost always traveled with him on trips abroad, and they both loved spending the weekends at Camp David. They used it more than any other presidential couple before or since. They also spent time at their ranch in California where she would join Ronnie for horseback rides even though she didn’t like it. They were like newlyweds, always cuddling and kissing.
While she served as first lady, she was also dealing with her aging parents. Her mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s while her stepfather was dying. Nancy was by his side when he died in 1983 and held a small service against his wishes which caused her stepbrother to not speak to her for over a year.
Their children were also a source of stress. Nancy didn’t want Ronnie to run again, but he felt like he needed to so she supported him. She was heavily involved in campaign decisions, including ads, and the press went easier on her.
“These days it is generally acknowledged that the First Lady has grown into her role. She is still more reserved, but she shows more humor about herself and has become a more relaxed speaker.” Maureen Dowd, New York Times
Nancy spoke at the Republican Convention – “Let’s make it one more for the Gipper.”
She was furious when the first debate against the Democratic candidate Walter Mondale didn’t go well, telling the staff to let “Ronnie be Ronnie.” They did and he won the next debate, leading to a landslide victory in November.
His second term got off to an inauspicious start when the bitter cold forced the ceremony inside (after he had taken the oath the day before in a private ceremony since it was a Sunday).
Their political advisors all changed as the president’s original staff were exhausted. A trip to Germany ended up causing headaches as they had agreed to go to a cemetery that had SS troops buried in it (even though they had asked beforehand). While the tour was difficult, Nancy got rave reviews for once as she danced flamenco in Spain and was lauded by Pope on her work with drug addiction.
More bad news would follow in July of 1985 when Ronnie was diagnosed with colon cancer. She took charge of his care and wouldn’t let anyone in his room (except for his national security advisor which they would later regret).
“First ladies aren’t elected, and they don’t receive a salary. They have mostly been private persons forced to live public lives, and in my book, they’ve all been heroes. Abigail Adams helped invent America. Dolley Madison helped protect it. Eleanor Roosevelt was FDR’s eyes and ears. Nancy Reagan is my everything.” Ronald Reagan while in the hospital recovering from colon cancer surgery
As he was discharged, Ronnie was also diagnosed with basal cell carcinoma on his nose. And just two years later in October of 1987, Nancy had suspicious spots on her annual mammogram that turned out to be cancer. She underwent a mastectomy and opted not to do reconstruction. Nine days later, her mother passed away.
In the middle of all of this was the Challenger explosion and the Iran-Contra Affair which threatened to take down the presidency.
“I feel like I’m going through a nightmare. And I can’t even see any light at the end of the tunnel. I’m beginning to wonder if this is going to last until the end of Ronnie’s presidency. God, I hope not.” Nancy Reagan
She blamed Don Regan, Ronnie’s chief of staff, as well as the national security advisor who had gotten Ronnie’s go ahead while he was in the hospital for cancer surgery. She hand-picked a speech writer for Ronnie’s mea cupla with the American public and helped run the rescue plan.
“Truly it can be said that Nancy Davis Reagan played the crucial role in saving the Reagan presidency and has already achieved a special place in the history of first ladies.” David Abshire, Reagan staffer
Ronald Reagan’s main goal in becoming president was to prevent the spread of communism and to defeat the Soviet Union – the “evil empire.” Nancy would attend most of the summits held with their Soviet counterparts, beginning in 1985. She was an asset with one staffer telling her, “Nancy you just won the Cold War.” when she spoke with the foreign minister.
The only person she couldn’t woo was Mikhail Gorbachev’s wife Raisa. They had a long-standing feud that, thankfully, didn’t prevent their husbands from achieving their diplomatic goals.
She was also with Ronnie when he gave his famous Berlin Wall speech in 1987.
In Ronnie’s second term, the press cooled from their attacks but traditionalists now thought she was being too much an activist. They even compared her to Edith Wilson who took over for President Woodrow Wilson when he was incapacitated from a stroke. Nancy brushed off the concerns.
“Although I don’t get involved in policy, it’s silly to suggest my opinion should not carry some weight with a man I’ve been married to for thirty-five years.” Nancy Reagan
As they looked to leave the White House, Nancy reluctantly supported George and Barbara Bush as their successors.
They made plans to move to Bel Air and said an emotional goodbye with White House staff.
“Look, dear, there’s our little bungalow.” Ronald Reagan upon leaving the White House in a helicopter for the last time
Private Life
Nancy was thrilled to get back to a normal life, the first time in over twenty years they wouldn’t be in the public spotlight.
“While I loved being first lady, my eight years with that title were the most difficult years of my life.” Nancy Reagan
She cared most about Ronnie’s legacy and was involved in the plans for his presidential library and museum in Simi Valley, which opened in 1991.
They were saddened by the amount of former staffers who wrote tell-alls. Her own memoir was published and seemed to ask for her children’s forgiveness with the dedication: “To Ronnie, who always understood. And to my children, who I hope will understand.”
She still feuded with Bushes and tried to get even with Iran-Contra conspiritor, Oliver North. However, all of the petty wars of words ended in 1994 when Ronnie was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. Nancy called it the “long goodbye,” and her care of Ronnie made her one of the most admired women in the country.
“The golden years are when you can sit back, hopefully, and exchange memories. And that’s the worst part about this disease. There’s nobody to exchange memories with, and we had a lot of memories.” Nancy Reagan
She sold their beloved ranch and refused almost all visitors and interviews. She reconciled with her children although Maureen passed away in 2001 from melanoma. She took up the controversial cause of embryonic stem cell research in hopes that it would provide some cure for Alzheimer’s. She wrote to President George W. Bush about federal funding for the research, and while he still put limits on it, Nancy still liked him. He gave her the Presidential Medal of Freedom in 2002 and invited her to stay at the White House, her first time back since she left on Inauguration Day in 1989.
Ronnie died on June 5, 2004. He opened his eyes and saw her the last time. “That’s the greatest gift you could have given me,” she said. There was a state funeral in Washington and then another in California where he was buried at his presidential library. Nancy laid an American flag and then her cheek on the casket, sobbing, “I can’t leave him.”
For the next twelve years, Nancy was devoted to his legacy, making sure his diaries and letters were published. Her health started to decline at the age of 90, and while she didn’t go out much, the telephone was her lifeline. Nancy died on March 6, 2016 at the age of 94.
“Don’t say I was tough. I was strong.” Nancy Reagan
Legacy
Nancy Reagan looms large in first lady history. She is remembered as the quintessential 1980s woman – tough, fashionable, strong, and caring. She had no agenda of her own other than to protect Ronnie. Their close, loving bond and political partnership was unique among first couples, and without her, Ronnie couldn’t have been the president that he was. Nancy didn’t seem to mind the hate from the press and, at times, the American public, as long as Ronnie was still beloved. It takes a strong constitution to withstand that.
While she was an exceptional wife, her role as a mother has been debated. Her own children seemed to resent her close relationship with their father and thought of it as excluding them. It was a sad reality of their family life.
Ronald Reagan is often listed as one of the top presidents in history. Without Nancy, it wouldn’t have been possible.
My Time with Nancy
This was an interesting month as Ronald Reagan is one of my favorite presidents of all time. However, Nancy doesn’t rank in a similar way among first ladies as she was hard to get to know. I am amazed at her strength and how she was singularly focused on supporting Ronnie, but I have a hard time getting past how her priorities affected her children. As a mother, I cannot imagine leaving my three-month-old to watch shows in Las Vegas even if it was in support of my husband.
However, Nancy should be lauded for all that she did for the White House from its renovations to the stunning china, which is one of my favorites. And I will be forever grateful that she started the White House Christmas ornament project. It is a lasting legacy that is one of my favorite Christmas traditions!
Ronald Reagan was larger than life, and Nancy succeeded in ensuring his legacy was handed down to the younger generations. For that alone, she should be applauded.
Travels with Nancy
While born in New York City and raised in Chicago, Nancy thought of California as home.
California
Ronald Reagan Presidential Library and Museum, Simi Valley
My favorite presidential library and museum is a must-see! Not only does it have amazing artifacts like the suit he was wearing the day he was shot, it also has Air Force One and Marine One in its pavilion. Kids will love it! I could have spent the whole day here when I visited in 2015.
Reagan Ranch, Santa Barbara
Not open to the public except through special events, this ranch was President Reagan’s favorite escape.
Washington, DC
Smithsonian National Museum of American History
You can see Nancy’s beautiful inauguration gown here along with a suit and her White House china.
To Learn More
Books to Read:
Links are Amazon affiliate links. Be sure to see my Bookshop.org list for all of the books related to my Booking It Through History: First Ladies project.
Nonfiction:
Nancy wrote her own memoirs and published her letters from Ronnie. There are also many biographies written about her.
My Turn: The Memoirs of Nancy Reagan
Written in a very engaging style, this memoir allows you to hear the love and warmth from Nancy that the press often ignored.
I Love You, Ronnie: The Letters of Ronald Reagan to Nancy Reagan
These are some of the sweetest letters written by Ronnie to his “Nancy Pants.”
The Triumph of Nancy Reagan by Karen Tumulty
This is a wonderfully detailed and fair biography about this complicated woman.
Lady in Red: An Intimate Portrait of Nancy Reagan by Sheila Tate
A beautiful biography full of images of Nancy’s amazing fashion choices and written by one of her staffers.
TV Shows/Movies
C-SPAN First Ladies: Influence and Image
Reagan (2024)
I watched this in the movie theaters at its release, and it was so inspiring and moving.
The Brink of War – coming this fall
Reagan (PBS)
The Reagans (Amazon)
Podcasts
The White House 1600 Sessions Podcast “The Triumph of Nancy Reagan”
Websites
Ronald Reagan Presidential Library and Museum
The White House Historical Association
- Note there is no Christmas ornament for the Reagan White House years yet, but the 2025 ornament used Nancy’s china pattern to honor State dinners.
Nancy Reagan was the strength behind the scenes of the Reagan White House. She may have been tiny, but her impact was massive!
